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twirlgrrlI hate how LJ emphasizes my interpersonal neuroses.
When I started friending people I jumped right in and commented on everyone's entries, all the time. But as I read more and more posts in communities, I saw comments about "stalkers" and didn't want to be perceived as one. So I got a little more reserved, both with adding new friends and with commenting.
Since then, I've gone through various phases of LJ interpersonal terror. I wonder if any of these will sound familiar to any of you--you know, you, readers, friends list, the ones who are supposedly reading this?
-Fear that I was commenting too much
-Fear that I was commenting too little
-Fear that I comment on every single entry in a person's LJ, thus coming across as stalkerish
-Fear that a friend secretly hates me because they didn't reply to my comment
-Fear that a friend secretly hates me because they NEVER reply to ANY of my comments
-Fear that I comment too much on tellinellen's LJ, since she kindly replies to EVERY COMMENT SHE RECEIVES, so I'm making work for her when I comment
-Fear that my entire friends list hates me because I don't get enough comments
-Fear that I'll start writing entries specifically to elicit comments
-Fear that no one reads my entries because I post at the wrong time of day/night
And on and on.
This is so funny to me, because in real life I am quite sociable and I don't stress about my relationships much at all. I wonder why LJ brings this out in me? Maybe because it's in writing?
I know that I love reading other LJs--I need to go back and read several of my friends from the beginning, in fact--and I do love to comment. And of course, part of the reason I participate in LJ rather than just journaling on my very own hard drive is to be part of the larger community, to build connections. It's like a giant, slow-motion discussion/support group.
The other day I was contemplating this commenting issue and I decided to throw caution to the wind. I decided to comment as much as I wanted, and if that meant commenting on every single post I read, then so be it. Well, that has lasted less than two days. No one is replying to my comments! (Except you, tellinellen, you're a paragon of replying.) No one is commenting to me! Forget the fact that I haven't even posted since I started this comment renaissance. I'm withdrawing from the comment renaissance. I am going back to comment hermithood.
As if I could ever shut up. :-)
When I started friending people I jumped right in and commented on everyone's entries, all the time. But as I read more and more posts in communities, I saw comments about "stalkers" and didn't want to be perceived as one. So I got a little more reserved, both with adding new friends and with commenting.
Since then, I've gone through various phases of LJ interpersonal terror. I wonder if any of these will sound familiar to any of you--you know, you, readers, friends list, the ones who are supposedly reading this?
-Fear that I was commenting too much
-Fear that I was commenting too little
-Fear that I comment on every single entry in a person's LJ, thus coming across as stalkerish
-Fear that a friend secretly hates me because they didn't reply to my comment
-Fear that a friend secretly hates me because they NEVER reply to ANY of my comments
-Fear that I comment too much on tellinellen's LJ, since she kindly replies to EVERY COMMENT SHE RECEIVES, so I'm making work for her when I comment
-Fear that my entire friends list hates me because I don't get enough comments
-Fear that I'll start writing entries specifically to elicit comments
-Fear that no one reads my entries because I post at the wrong time of day/night
And on and on.
This is so funny to me, because in real life I am quite sociable and I don't stress about my relationships much at all. I wonder why LJ brings this out in me? Maybe because it's in writing?
I know that I love reading other LJs--I need to go back and read several of my friends from the beginning, in fact--and I do love to comment. And of course, part of the reason I participate in LJ rather than just journaling on my very own hard drive is to be part of the larger community, to build connections. It's like a giant, slow-motion discussion/support group.
The other day I was contemplating this commenting issue and I decided to throw caution to the wind. I decided to comment as much as I wanted, and if that meant commenting on every single post I read, then so be it. Well, that has lasted less than two days. No one is replying to my comments! (Except you, tellinellen, you're a paragon of replying.) No one is commenting to me! Forget the fact that I haven't even posted since I started this comment renaissance. I'm withdrawing from the comment renaissance. I am going back to comment hermithood.
As if I could ever shut up. :-)
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no subject
Date: 2006-11-02 02:45 pm (UTC);)
you know I love you very much...I'm guessing your comment woes have nothing to do with me...
and you know I'm in a funk right now.
more so than comments, I wish I could get you on the phone sometimes...but even leaving messages for eachother is nice...your messages often make me smile
btw, can you pass the info to Evan that several of us are going to The End Up this Friday? the usual crowd, plus two of my other friends, plus a co worker and her friend (they can practice Japanese)
I hope he can go, it would be fun...of course as always, the more the merrier!
speak to you soon (in some form!)
no subject
Date: 2006-11-02 02:50 pm (UTC)I'll tell Evan.
Thanks for commenting! ;-)